Today I  took a trip to Atlanta, Texas to celebrate Thanksgiving.  Atlanta is an East Texas town of about 6500 people.  As I drove through “downtown” Atlanta it was clear that that any resemblance to its namesake in Georgia was in name only.  It was named after Atlanta, Georgia because many of the early settlers were from that area.

It was a typical one street downtown as I have seen in other small Texas towns such as Olney, Boyd and Archer City where the classic movie The Last Picture Show was filmed.   Streets like you would see in any “Route 66” town across America.    As is standard in small Texas towns, there is a barber, candy shop, bank, hardware store, bakery, sporting goods store, few antique stores, a Dairy Queen and of course a huge, bustling, Walmart.  The staples of  life that can be cut and pasted to countless small towns across America.

There were also numerous boarded up storefronts.

The Atlanta Chamber of Commerce Web Site states:

“Atlanta exemplifies small town America. Warm smiles and warmer greetings reflect a friendly and progressive community.”

What Atlanta and other small towns all over the country never envisioned when they were formed (Atlanta was founded in 1872)  was that small town America would one day be synonymous with the arrival of Walmart.

Today in Atlanta as I lay in a turkey coma on the couch watching The Dallas Cowboys dismantle their opponent in their new stadium dubbed “The Death- Star”  I casually mentioned that it was sad that there were so many boarded up stores. Out of the depths of my turkey fog I heard a voice in the room yell out”

Walmart Did This To Us!

It then occurred to me.   Many in small town America may look at  the arrival of Walmart as the invasion of Evil Empire and its own type of economic Death-Star

Darth Vader, who was unmasked many years ago, didn’t initially destroy these towns with his death ray. He arrived with the promise of peace and prosperity. The Death -Star then set down in the middle of town,  touting every possible convenience a person could want at cheaper prices, with greater diversity and quantity.  Unfortunately no Jedi Knights ever came to the rescue.  They were to busy fueling up their Starfighters at discount prices.

Now, instead of seeing the sign “Victory Tonight And Free Haircut Tomorrow” if the high school football team or basketball team wins, we see, “Going Out of Business Liquidation Sale.”

How can the “It’s A Wonderful Life” dream of small town America possibly compete with the neon lit entrance to the Death Star just a block away?  Instead we see “The Last Picture Show” at the local theater just before it closes for good to be transformed into a Walgreens.  The residents of Atlanta, Texas leave the theater and disappear into the Death Star never to be heard from again by the local merchants.

©2009 Brian Cuban

Sesame Street’s introduction of the Bill O’Reilly based Muppet, “Spill O’Reilly” has sparked media outrage and internal dissension within the Fox ranks.

Network executives at msnbc and CNN issued statements calling for equal Muppet time. They also questioned the propriety of a publicly funded television network such as PBS tacitly endorsing such a controversial figure as O’Reilly.

Glenn Beck, promoted his growing, “Just Say No to Spill” campaign on his Twitter page releasing the following tweet:

“While I have the utmost respect for Spill I am very disappointed that PBS has decided to go with his Muppet and not my “Big Mouth Beck”

He also released the following statement on his web site:

I proposed a “Big Mouth Beck” Muppet to “The Street” months ago. The mouth would get bigger and the rhetoric of “Big Mouth” would get more outlandish with each show. I even had an entire “chalkboard sub-plot”

When it was pointed out that most children watching Sesame Street are not old enough to comprehend his type of “rhetoric” Beck retorted:

“Like my wildly popular Fox show, “Big Mouth” will yell a lot and make no sense. All kids can identify with that.”

Conservative commentator Ann Coulter also took issue with “Spill” during a recent radio interview stating she had her own Muppet in the works and that her Muppet, “Too Cool Coulter” had already written three sure to be NY Times bestsellers.

Executives at msnbc were outraged. Keith Olbermann stated:

“We have documented a noticeable trend of Sesame Streets episodes to the right with each season since former president George Bush Jr. appeared on the show.”

When it was pointed out the former President Bush never appeared on Sesame Street and it was in fact former first Lady Laura Bush, Olbermann replied:

“That’s what the far right wants the American public to think. What we have is a far right Sesame Street conspiracy and Bush Administration cover-up far worse than 9-11. I can prove that it was really George Bush in drag.

Fringe Extremist Anti-Muslim Blogger Debbie Schlussel even chimed in stating:

“I have definitive evidence that Sesame Street is nothing more than a subversive Muslim plot to radicalize our youth turning them into young Radical Muslim sleeper cells”

She went on to say that every time Sesame Street aired, The Muppets were using secret radical indoctrination hand signs combined with an over-the-air signal being beamed into the household that could be used to activate a sleeper cell.

Schlussel promised that she would be filing a motion in Federal court to have the Sesame Street Muppets declared a national security threat and immediately taken off the air.

White spokesman Robert Gibbs called an emergency press briefing. He stated that with the Spill O’Reilly announcement, the White House no longer considered Sesame Street legitimate puppet programming for children and henceforth the Muppets would be barred from all presidential puppet shows.

Stay tuned for further developments

My recent exchange of twitter barbs with the extremist Islamophobe otherwise known as Debbie Schlussel has made for some entertaining blog content. The most recent is no exception.

It is no secret that Debbie Schlussel and I do not like each other.  It is no secret that Debbie does not like Oprah Winfrey. If you doubt me, please take into consideration the fact that Debbie is the Whois registered owner of the domain oprahsucks.com.

I feel no need to defend Oprah.  She can muster more social media power to defend herself than anyone on this planet if she feels the need. While I suspect that Oprah views Debbie as an irrelevant dirt-speck on the landscape of the world’s issues as I do, this provides the needed context.

After noticing a post on Debbie’s web site, in which she put up a photo of Oprah Winfrey in Islamic garb with associated commentary clearly  intending not to portray her in a flattering light, I tweeted the following:

Is there a more despicable hate mongering bigot in this country than @DebbieSchlussel she makes me want to vomit http://tinyurl.com/y9r2gc9

Admittedly strong stuff.  There is no mistaking how I feel. I make no apologies for it. I view her as a despicable human being.  I even feel an urge to upchuck as I write this blog.

A tweep who saw my  original tweet responded injecting ultra-conservative commentator and author Anne Coulter into the fray.  For the record, I am no fan of hers either but she is clearly much more known and influential than Debbie on any issue she speaks on.  Here was my response:

@alcep agree, the only difference is that Anne Coulter is a real lawyer while @DebbieSchlussel was a joke as an attorney 6:29 PM Nov 21st from TweetDeck

My reference was to an article I had previously posted on my blog in which I referenced Debbie’s ridiculous and failed attempt to stifle 1st amendment free speech.

In 2002 Debbie filed a lawsuit designed to stop Pro-Palestinian conference at the University of Michigan.  The attempt of course failed drawing the following response:

“Meanwhile, Fadi Kiblawi, co-founder of SAFE and a Michigan senior from St. Louis, said the Michigan lawsuit is a “laughable attempt to stifle debate, which strikes at the core of American values and First Amendment rights.”

I agree with Mr. Kiblawi.  The attempt was laughable.  It was a joke.

I received the following “tweet” from Debbie:

@bcuban Do U want a defamation suit? U work handouts from Ur bro. I’ve won almost every case I’ve tried. We know who is the joke.

I get the “living off your brother’s coat-tails” comments on a regular basis.  Does not bother me at all.  I feel no need to justify my standing in life. If you put yourself out there with strong opinions you cant flinch when they come back at you but hey,  It was GAME ON!

Here were my responses  in succession. I am leaving out the screen-caps to save room:

@DebbieSchlussel strike a nerve? 5:40 PM Nov 21st from Tweetie in reply to DebbieSchlussel

@DebbieSchlussel if your going to insult me at least be creative-your a writer-I think 5:50 PM Nov 21st from Tweetie in reply to DebbieSchlussel

@DebbieSchlussel if you think that is defamation knock yourself out 5:42 PM Nov 21st from Tweetie in reply to DebbieSchlussel

I must have really gotten under Debbie’s skin(mission accomplished) because I then saw that Debbie threatened a tweep who re-tweeted my “joke” tweet.

Anne Coulter has never practiced law?  That is probably news to Anne.  Whatever you think of her she has a  very impressive legal resume including private practice.  Is that defamation?  It must be according to Debbie’s 1st year Torts and Con Law profs.. chuckle chuckle( I can’t say joke or I might get sued).

Is Anne pissed?  I doubt she  will ever know and if she did we have that relevance thing again. Ooops, I forgot. We are talking about Debbie and not Anne.  I meant to say irrelevance.

Seeing that I had indeed gotten under her skin. I just could not let it go.  My last tweet was:

@DebbieSchlussel quit crying and threatening everyone like a 3 year old. Bring your lawsuit Debbie. 8:31 PM Nov 21st from web

I am still waiting for Debbie’s defamation lawsuit.

Will I get “Schlusseled”?

She may want to go re-take torts, con-law and add an I.P. course to boot.  She has a better shot with a complaint that I used her Oprah photo without her permission.  Let me know if it bothers you Debbie.  I will be happy to take it down and put my smiling face up. No Islam garb though.  I don’t even wear a yarmulke/kippah that often.

Maybe the jokes on me.  We will see.  If I get sued I will put up a Paypal “Donate Here” button on my site like Debbie has.  Yes you heard me.   A practicing attorney who claims to be successful has a Paypal donation button on her website.  Way to maximize that brand Debbie!

I have recently seen some twitter chatter  as to whether  the recent 1 game suspension of Clippers longtime play-by-play announcer Ralph Lawler and color analyst Michael Smith was appropriate.

Was Fox Sports being too “politically correct”?

They were both suspended by the Fox Sports Prime Ticket cable network for their comments about Memphis center Hamed Haddadi.  Haddadi is Irania born. The exchange occurred during a telecast of a game against Memphis. The transcript as reported in the LA times reads as follows:

Smith: “Look who’s in.”

Lawler: “Hamed Haddadi. Where’s he from?”

Smith: “He’s the first Iranian to play in the NBA.” (Smith pronounced Iranian as “Eye-ranian,” a pronunciation that offended the viewer who complained.)

Lawler: “There aren’t any Iranian players in the NBA,” repeating Smith’s mispronunciation.

Smith: “He’s the only one.”

Lawler: “He’s from Iran?”

Smith: “I guess so.”

Lawler: “That Iran?”

Smith: “Yes.”

Lawler: “The real Iran?”

Smith: “Yes.”

Lawler: “Wow. Haddadi that’s H-A-D-D-A-D-I.”

Smith: “You’re sure it’s not Borat’s older brother?”

Smith: “If they ever make a movie about Haddadi, I’m going to get Sacha Baron Cohen to play the part.”

Lawler: “Here’s Haddadi. Nice little back-door pass. I guess those Iranians can pass the ball.”

Smith: “Especially the post players.

Lawler: “I don’t know about their guards.”

Political correctness run amok or appropriate discipline?

The answer is in the question.  Basketball is about sports competition, not politics.

Regardless of the lack of ill intent or intended humor in the exchange, there is no place for racial or off-color ethnic comedy in the NBA announcer’s booth.

Ralph Smith and Michael Lawler were employed by Fox for one purpose and one purpose only, to provide BASKETBALL related play by play and color commentary for NBA basketball games. The moment they strayed into “off-color”commentary where we have to debate “political correctness” they were unacceptably outside the scope of  their job descriptions whether it was about an Iranian, Jew or Muslim.(Ironically Sacha Baron Cohen is in fact Jewish)

Let’s leave  the debate over “political correctness” to the varied content of Fox News.  Fox Sports is supposed to be about sports.  Fox knew this and took appropriate action.  I suspect that Smith and Lawler while not happy about it, agree with and understand the action taken.  Kudos to Fox for keeping their eye on the basketball.

(Exchange begins at 1:01)