Andrew Koenig is dead. I did not know him.  I knew of his father.  I am a huge Trekkie and could tell you the plot of every episode of the original Star Trek series.  Andrew’s father of course played Ensign Pavel Chekov in the original Star Trek. Andrew was  best known as Richard “Boner” Stabbone on ABC’s sitcom Growing Pains

I did not know Andrew but I knew his pain.  As I followed the story of his disappearance and learned about his  battle with  depression and recent slide into the darkest finality of the suicide abyss, I was reminded of just how all so fast it happens.   I read so many things that rang up painful memories of my past.  My slide into the same bottomless pit of night.

This  slide into darkness has its own unique components for different people. Some are luckier than others in the support they get or their ability to reach out for that support.   I was very lucky.  I had everyone who loved me living in my city and within a few miles of me.  They were all in my life and knew my routines. That is what saved me. If I did not have that I would be dead.

I do not remember placing the Italian 45-caliber automatic pistol that my best friend had given me for a gift on my nightstand. I do not remember emailing him for bullets.  I do not remember emailing others of my desire to end my life. I realize now that it was my way of reaching out for help.  My only memory of those terrible few days on the edge 6 years ago was being  wakened out  of a Xanax stupor by people who cared for me. It happens that easy.   It was all so easy to slide in the fog from a Xanax coma to a 45 cal bullet. It did not happen.  People loved me, cared and intervened.

I have battled depression for much all of my adult life.I really could not tell you how long because you have to realize it’s an issue to start the clock.   It has had its ups and downs.  Medication works wonders. Talking to professionals helps. Having a family that loves me, recognized something was wrong and was willing to intervene is something that many who suffer do not have. I am very lucky.

There however was one dark period that the low was so low and the fog of depression was so great that I only have vague memories of literally living on the edge of permanent darkness.

I have thought about telling this story before. I have always backed off because of self-interest.  I did not want to be perceived as spent.  I did not want to be stereotyped, stigmatized or slandered. I did not want sympathy.   In the end, it is what it is.  If someone can take the message from this that there is hope and recovery from the edge of darkness to happiness and accomplishment in life. If someone will see that reaching out even when you do not want to has the greatest up side at all.  If one person gets that I will take all the  S’s people can throw at me.

Actor Nic Cage recently disclosed that he was in dire financial straights. Another star caught up in a celebrity cash crunch with a new but sadly familiar story in the Hollywood ranks of stars either unable or unwilling to take an interest in the mechanics of their finances and paying a heavy price.  It is being reported that actor Nicolas Cage filed a $20 million lawsuit against his former business manager Samuel Levin. He alleges that the manager failed to pay taxes when they were due and had placed him in speculative and risky real estate investments “resulting in (the actor) suffering catastrophic losses.”

Nic is not the only star to go down “the road to financial ruin”  Many a star has fallen victim to bad investments bad advice and down right fraud because they detach themselves from the fruits of their labor.

Facing bankruptcy, former Johnny Carson sidekick Ed McMahon  went public regarding the financial miscues leading to the possible foreclosure on his $4.8 million mansion.  He owed more than $600,000 on the mortgage, some $750,000 to American Express, and around $1.5 million overall.

“Being Ed McMahon was an expensive proposition,” David Fisher, the co-author of McMahon’s autobiography, told the Huffington Post. Fisher recalled watching as McMahon walked through hotel lobbies doling out money to anyone who tipped his cap. In a Larry King Live interview, McMahon’s wife Pam McMahon explained, “Because you’re a celebrity, people think you have a lot more than you have. And you always want to take great care of all of your friends and your family and everybody, and you do …. ”

It’s hard to sympathize. Did anyone really feel sorry for singer MC Hammer after he declared bankruptcy in 1996?  When he filed the paperwork, we learned that his living expenses far exceeded his annual income of $33 million: Hammer owned a $12 million house and reportedly had a staff of 250.  (Yes, 250.) Who wouldn’t love to see that spreadsheet?

And the list of celebrities and athletes who’ve gone bust goes on: Michael Jackson, Kim Basinger, Suge Knight, Dorothy Hamill, Burt Reynolds, Mike Tyson, Anna Nicole Smith ….

Why is it that celebrities and pro athletes who seem to have everything can’t seem to control anything related to finances?  They make millions, but they live paycheck to paycheck.  Most of them couldn’t tell you how much they have in their checking account. Many have never written a check or seen a bank statement.  From time to time, they go broke, but don’t even know it until their agent or business manager tells them.

The public perception is that these high-paid celebrities and athletes are completely out of touch with basic money management skills. Is that perception accurate?  I spoke with several professional athletes and Hollywood celebrities to find out.

“Most celebrities I know do not manage their own finances,” the actor Ed Begley Jr. told me.  Begley’s been around—best known for his role as Dr. Victor Ehrlich on the television series St. Elsewhere, he currently hosts a reality show on HGTV called Living With Ed on Planet Green—so he’s seen actors enter and exit, financially speaking. “I can count on one hand the celebrities that I know who write their own checks,” he says. “I know many who sign their own checks, but I’m talking about doing it all yourself on Quicken or QuickBooks, as I do. I actually enjoy it.”

Celebrities, Begley says, need to to do more with their money than just spend it. “At the very least, make sure that no one other than you can sign a check for over $500. That would save a lot of the heartache you hear about with folks losing all their dough to someone they blindly turned over their fortune to.”

Celebrities can be especially vulnerable, the actor Armand Assante (Gotti, American Gangster) told me, because not only do they frequently make enormous sums of money, but the perception that they handle it badly can attract greedy hangers-on.  “There’s a general perception that people in the arts and entertainment industry have little business acumen,” Assante says. “They are therefore easy prey to financial exploitation.”

I asked Assante how he handled his finances.

“I’ve always had good instincts in business,” he said.  “I have very little interest in it for its own sake, so I have chosen people I entrust important decisions with.  That’s where your instinct has to reign. Most of the people I deal with are impeccable with excellent business sense and do superbly for me because they’re trustworthy, reliable and independent in their decisions.  Sadly however, even the best-intentioned of financial advisors fall prey to others if profit is the moral motive of the moment.”

Ultimately, Armand says, “one has to assume total accountability.”

The financial landscape is no less bleak in professional sports. I’ve seen estimates projecting that 50 percent of all NBA athletes live paycheck to paycheck—this in a sport where the minimum salary is currently $442,000 for a rookie—and that over 60 percent of NBA athletes are broke within five years of retirement. There’s no reason to expect that the numbers are much different in other sports.

“It’s hard to argue with the widespread perception that athletes and celebrities are the worst managers of their money,” says Patrick Johnson, a former wide receiver for the Baltimore Ravens and the Toronto Argonauts of the Canadian Football League. Part of the problem, he says, is that they then turn to advisors whom they shouldn’t trust. “Exposure to so many unethical advisors paves the way for what eventually happens. Any advisor that is worth anything should care about what happens to his client.  Many of them do not.”

Spending too much, paying insufficient attention to their finances, trusting their money to people whom they haven’t thoroughly vetted ….

Everyone can enjoy a little schadenfreude in seeing overpaid celebrities and their money soon parted. But are their financial mistakes really so different from ours?

©2010 Brian Cuban

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** I originally wrote this article for Worth Magazine.  I am republishing it with their permission.

I don’t heart Hamas but do enjoy the humor of Jennifer Jajeh in her wildly poplar one-person show “I Heart Hamas: And Other Things I am Afraid To Tell You”.

Join me February 9th at 4pm(CT) for the 1st Revolution Rant Broadcast of 2010. Simply point your web-browser to:

http://www.briancuban.com/cuban-live/

Jennifer will be talking about her show and what it really means to “Heart Hamas“.  I took a lot of heat for scheduling Jennifer, being called a “Self-Hating Jew, Hamas sympathizer and a “Bad Jew” That tells me this will be a controversial great show!  Let talk to Jennifer about her show and the line between artistic and political expression.

Here is a little bit about Jennifer and her show, I Heart Hamas”

Jennifer Jajeh is a San Francisco based artist. As an actor, she has appeared in numerous film, television, commercial and theatre productions.  She received her actor’s training at the Lee Strasberg Theatre Conservatory in NYC and the American Conservatory Theatre in SF.

In addition to her work as an actor, she has produced and directed award winning independent film and video projects. Her two short films, “In My Own Skin” and “Fruition”, have screened nationally and internationally in film festivals, museums, art galleries and universities. Jennifer is currently documenting a year in the life of an actor and all the ridiculousness involved in pursuing an acting career in her blog called thefamegame.

With the current ongoing conflicts in the Middle East, the threat of global terrorism, and the never-ending negotiations and hostilities between Israelis and Palestinians, it’s hard not to feel overwhelmed by all of the bad international news.

That’s exactly how Jennifer Jajeh feels. And to make matters worse, Jennifer is Palestinian. Well, Palestinian American. Or more precisely: a single, Christian, first generation, Palestinian American woman who chooses to return to her parents’ hometown of Ramallah at the start of the Second Intifada.

Join her on American and Palestinian soil on auditions, bad dates, and across military checkpoints as she navigates the thorny terrain around Palestinian identity. Weaving together humor, slides, pop culture references and live theater, Jajeh explores how she becomes Palestinian-ized, then politicized and eventually radicalized in a fresh, often funny, searingly honest way.

“I Heart Hamas: And Other Things I’m Afraid To Tell You”, recognized by NYTheatre.com as “a fascinating look into a world we don’t often see or hear about,” made its world premiere in 2008 as a part of New York’s International Fringe Festival. Following strong media praise and audience reception, the play made its San Francisco debut on September 17, 2009 as a co-production with Off-Market Theatres.  Jennifer has recently announced that her show will be taking on the road to Minneapolis, Minnesota.