Anyone who lives in the North Texas area is aware of the tragic loss of life that took place in Grapevine, Texas on Christmas day.  Azizolah “Bob” Yazdanpanah, who is reportedly Muslim,  dressed as Santa Claus,  fatally shot six family members on Christmas Day before killing himself.  A terrible tragedy.  My heart goes out to the Yazdanpanah family and all affected by this senseless act of violence.

Upon opening up my Facebook news-feed yesterday, there were numerous references to the shooting.  One of the story-lines that seemed to be taking on a life of it’s own were people posting that this was an “honor killing”.  I was surprised as nothing had been reported as such. The police had issued a statement that day stating that no motive had been developed.  Many of the Facebookers grabbing on to the honor killing angle also accused our local media of engaging in a “coverup” of that fact.

Where did this honor killing story come from?  How did it go from a tragic event still being investigated to a stereotyped event devoid of factual basis meant to degrade and dehumanize the family and the tragedy because they were Muslim?  It was clear from the posts that the predominate response  was catering to the stereotype with an “it figures.” type response.  “It figures” because stereotypes tell us that all Muslim husbands are abusive and when a Muslim father is unhappy with who his daughter is dating he kills her right?  So where did this “honor killing angle” come from?   The story appeared to have  originated with these  fringe”sources”:

Jihad Watch:  A far right blog that spends  much of it’s time proving that all Muslims are evil people. The blog claims to have interviews with friends/classmates of one of the victims. They talk about how strict the father was and how upset he was at his daughter’s dating situation.  The blog is  vague on whether the author did the interviews or got them from another source.  I can find no mainstream reference to any of the alleged quotes from classmates.  In fact, the Fort Worth Star Telegram, the closest major newspaper vicinity wise, did in fact interview friends of the victims, one of whom stated that this was not an honor killing:

“This was not an honor killing,” Jessica Toumani, a friend of the Zarei family’s, said in a statement e-mailed to the Star-Telegram.”We are not sure of much at this point, but we are sure that is not a viable theory. Aziz was never religious, nor were any of the victims. They left Iran to escape the Islamic regime, which is why most Iranians left.”

Atlas Shrugged:  This lady who runs this blog,  Pamela Gellar is one of the biggest hate mongering, Islamaphobic, bigots on this planet.  I won’t give her any link love.   She grabbed onto the  Jihad Watch story and put her own Anti-Muslim spin on it.

The International Business Times:   If you read their story, they cite Jihad Watch as their source on the honor killing angle.

I confronted one Facebook poster who maintained that the tragedy was an Honor killing.  He cited the IBT story.  When I pointed out that the police had not released a motive and that the story was citing blogs and not legitimate reporting sources he then stated that he had also heard a local Dallas news station report it as an honor killing.  I contacted the reporter he named. She stated that no such report had ever been broadcast as the police had not stated a motive.  When I confronted the person with her denial, he reverted to his first source insisting that it was a legitimate original source for the story.  It of course is not but it was enough for him because it validated his fears and stereotypes well as  allowing  him to spread the canard to validate everyone else’s.

Before writing this blog, I Googled the search term “Grapevine Honor Killing” There were 118, 000 potential hits.  Of course, not all will be relevant to the story but it seems clear that as of the writing of this blog, the Honor Killing theory has spread  from three fringe sources, two of which make it their business to stir up anti-Muslim hatred to pretty much the entire far right-wing Islamaphobic Bogosphere, Facebook and Twitter.

That, my friends, is how hate goes viral.

The Confederacy is rising again in Texas.  At least in the form of specialty license plates.  The Texas division of the Sons of Confederate Veterans has filed a lawsuit in Texas federal court arguing that the Department of Motor Vehicles violated its it’s First Amendment rights  by refusing to issue a license plate featuring a Confederate flag.  As a point of clarification, vanity plates are plates in which you pick the license plate symbols.   Specialty plates are plates the state issues with various organizations.   For instance, here in Texas, we now have a Dallas Mavericks specialty plate.  The Sons Of Confederate Veterans would be a Specialty Plate.  If my license plate read “CUBES”, that would be a vanity plate.

When I think of the Confederate flag I think of rednecks, racism and NASCAR not necessarily in that order.  Before you hang me from the nearest Texas Motor Speedway light-pole,  I have admittedly not watched many NASCAR races.  In the one race I did attend at Las Vegas Motor Speedway, there were many confederate flags draped from RV’s in the parking lot with the occupants engaging in activities that would simply be drunkenly boorish in any other venue but adding in the Confederate flag screamed redneck.  I don’t think I am going out on a limb in opning that some of them would not know the Battle Of  Fort Sumter from Bunker Hill.

NASCAR aside, this is a case in which the Sons will probably prevail or the DMV will relent and issue the plate before it gets that far. Regardless of the varied meanings the flag embodies and that the state actually owns the plates, it can not engage in viewpoint discrimination.  Nine other states have approved Sons Of Confederate Veterans’ specialty plates, several only after being sued.  There are other issues that could come in to play such as the fact that the plates are actually the property of the state and therefore  constitute a non-public forum or whether the plates constitute  goverment speech as compared to private speech.  This could change the standard of review more in favor of the state.  I however, don’t see those issues affecting the constitutionality of the Sons Of Confederate Veterans plates.

As Jeff Foxworthy would say:  “You might be a redneck if…”   Having confederate flag plate would certainly make my list.  If it does not make yours and you want one in Texas you will have to wait a bit before branding yourself one to the motoring public.   Never fear however,  you will get to  do it.  It’s your constitutional right to be a redneck.

Should Penn State have declined a bowl invitation to play in the Ticket City Bowl  against the Houston Cougars  in Dallas on January 2?  The pro opinion is pretty much the same rhetoric that has been spouted since the Jerry Sandusky scandal broke.  People are rightly outraged at the failure to act by those who are accountable  and the specter of a institutional coverup. Many believe that the the declining of a bowl invitation is a “just punishment” to those who have failed to act and surely covered up these awful events. Some believe it will deter similar future conduct. There are those who  believe it is simply the “moral” thing to do.

Let’s keep our eye on the ball.  Who are we punishing and for what reason?  What future conduct are we trying to deter and for what reason? Whose  morality are we trying to satisfy?  We all agree that the conduct Sandusky is accused of is sickening and heinous.  If convicted, the legal and “moral” thing is that he live out his life behind prison walls. That’s the easy one.  The failure to act by Grahm Spanier, Joe Paterno and others is troubling.  Those who did not act have either been held or are in the process of being held accountable.  Despite the trend towards inserting our own facts to satisfy our immediate blood lust, the bottom line is that there is still many questions unanswered of who knew what and what they did with the information.  These questions will be answered as the wheels of justice slowly turn.

How does this extend to young adults who had absolutely nothing to do with the scandal?  What legal, deterrent or moral high ground is established by punishing these kids by denying them one of their dreams.   Are we deluding ourselves into thinking that this is something the alleged victims want?  That prohibiting innocent kids from playing in a bowl game will somehow alleviate their  pain to any degree?  Is the goal of punishing those who had no involvement in the scandal meant to accomplish something positive or is it simply punishment for punishments sake. Generalized hatred so intense and all consuming.  Hatred for hatred’s sake.

Let’s keep our eye on the ball.  This is not about kids and coaches having nothing to do with any of this playing in a bowl game.  Let them enjoy the moment they worked so hard for.  If you think that the alleged victims would not be in agreement with this, you are deluding yourself with your own “moral’ righteous anger.  No need to create  innocent villains and victims out of hatred.  There is enough of that in this world already.

Sandusky tells NBC’s Bob Costas, “I love to be around them, but no, I’m not sexually attracted to young boys.  I love young people.” However, Sandusky admitted that he showered with, hugged and touched the children, but in a non –sexual manner?  Costas: “Are you a pedophile?”  Sandusky: “No.  I probably shouldn’t have showered with the boys.” That seemed to be his only regret.  We’ve all heard the interview, and most likely more than one time.

It is traumatic and disturbing when sexual offenses, committed by anyone, especially those in positions of power and trust, become a part of our reality.  As a Licensed Sex Offender Treatment Provider, I work daily with sexual offenders and victims, and yet I truly grieve for the victims and families in the wake of this Penn. State scandal.  Numerous individuals were disconnected from reality in this case, and connected in a conspiracy to keep this child sex abuse scandal a secret.  I wouldn’t have believed it, but after reading the Grand Jury report, and viewing the Sandusky interview with Bob Costas, which may go down as his last recorded words, I see a disturbing story of rape and misuse of power.

The nation listened, in a collective pause, to hear anything that might be “his” truth. THE truth! We received no answer.  I heard absolute denial, no admission of guilt, no clarity of thought, no apology, and perhaps no soul.  For me, he seems to possess little understanding of anything he’s done.  I heard a feeble, dead with denial, voice. It was very unsettling and left me feeling like I was listening to John Wayne Gacey answer for his deeds, in a John Wayne body and voice.  How does this happen? A beloved, elderly coach, in the heart of middle-America, responded in an interview , and as Costas said, “If you were unfamiliar with the name Sandusky, sadly he will now be remembered as a criminal, and a monster.”  We’re not speaking of a 23 yr old, or a 43 yr old, but an older individual that through many years has perpetrated horrific acts on innocent victims; which include those that caught him, saw it happen, heard it, did report it, didn’t report it.    Who advised him to participate in this interview? Was he medicated, and is he on suicide watch?  All of these questions were all over the morning news programs; it’s the lead in every show.

Here are some major points that the general public needs to know:

Epidemiological research notes that 1% to 3% of men are sexually attracted to children.  Men who molest children rationalize their actions, often to a point of denial. We all listened to that first hand, when we as a nation held a cumulative breath, waiting for his answer, he denied it all.  Sadly, many offenders, I’ve worked with, characterized the relationship as a “mentoring” relationship: “Second Mile Gone Wild.”  If you listen to the interview, you can hear all of this in the thread of the interview.

Pedophiles do not fit neatly into “creepy” profiles.  They can fill any role in society, particularly a leadership role with children.  We have seen similar stories with the Catholic Church, The Boy Scouts of America, Big Brothers/Big Sisters, Orphanage staff and the like.

Approximately 70% of the victims, in child sex abuse cases, know the offender.  Serial child molesters seek vulnerable children and employ means to cultivate relationships with them. Children usually are not picked at random. They are screened by systematic desensitization techniques (many are detailed in the Grand Jury report).  Because of Penn State’s credibility, parents were willing to allow staff to have unrestricted access to their kids.

What might happen now?

Sandusky may be near the point of suicide. When listening to his interview, I heard “dead with denial”, possibly nothing to live for. He has legal representation, but the collective of the testimony that will mount against him will certainly render a guilty verdict at some level. I have worked with many pedophilic felons that were “executives” prior to their conviction. This group is especially prone to suicidal ideation, intent, and plan at this stage of the legal process. Sandusky may be portrayed by the media as an older, “broken down” individual.  He may play the “I was sexually abused as a child” defense which would be a useful strategy to keep punishment in a lower range.

Additionally, I wonder if there was ever any child pornography viewed on Penn State computers or any computer of Sandusky’s. Moreover, the boy that was at the Alamo Bowl, in San Antonio, might itself result in a separate criminal investigation.  Transporting a child across state lines for the purpose of sexual exploitation may be something to examine further.  These possibilities could result in a federal investigation.  A federal sex offense case almost assures a conviction and prison time.

Child Witnesses Recant?

This was brought up in the interview loosely. When there are multiple solid testimonies, it is very difficult to recant.  Unlike the McMartin Day Care case, these victims are independent cases with no other proximal ties, thus maximizing the credibility of the testimony. Again, the number of boys involved here will likely make recanting a non-issue.

Happy Valley to Neverland…

I hesitate to reference Michael Jackson’s Neverland, especially in lieu of the recent trial that’s coming to an end. The names “Neverland” and “Happy Valley” feel almost eerie to say, especially now in light of this scandal, not to mention the title of his book, “Touch”.  It is now a place where deep dark secrets are kept, where Gerald Sandusky was allowed to prey on innocent kids, at everyone’s expense. It is a place where innocent lives were tarnished and forever changed. There are no winners here.

Did you know…

Sandusky started “The Second Mile” in State College, Pennsylvania, in 1977.  It began as a group foster home for helping troubled boys.  Through “The Second Mile”, he had access to hundreds of boys, many of whom were vulnerable, due to their social situations. He took total advantage of his position, and no one cared.  Sandusky retired from “The Second Mile” in 2010.

Clinical information regarding the “mind of a perpetrator”:

Grooming:

The term is used to classify sex offending behavior that begins with flirting. Efforts, no doubt, were made to get the victim interested in Sandusky. In his case, that might’ve involved gifts, attention, followed by light touch, which progressed to more touch.  All of these elements come together to get the victim to comply, and create the perfect storm. Sadly, threats and intimidation may also be used to achieve compliance, all at the victim’s expense. The next step… the offense cycle begins: thoughts, fantasies, and all things leading to the deviant act. Needy children are the perfect target for abuse.

Clinically speaking, after acting out, the perpetrator might feel positive, happy, negative, unhappy, or some of both. Feelings and arousal can keep the offense cycle going, indefinitely. Some offenders that experience satisfaction, go right back to the acting out stage. Feeling guilty or upset could even lead to reoffending, very similar to having a hangover, but drinking more to feel better. I’ll spare you the rest of the hard-core details. It’s not an easy read, nor easy to write. It is particularly difficult to address, and sadly for that reason perhaps it wasn’t.

That’s it for now folks. We watch and we wait.

Bruce Cameron, M.S., LPC-S, LSOTP is a Licensed Professional Counselor and Licensed Sex Offender Treatment Provider in the Dallas Fort Worth area. He has worked with adult and juvenile Sexual Offenders since 1990 in a variety of state, federal and other institutional capacities. Website: www.cameronlpc.com