Dating In A “Wiki” World



Every now and then, when I am bored, I scan wall posts of some of my Facebook friends. It can be a pretty good gauge of what people are doing for fun in your town. It is also a daily soap opera of “Days Of Our Lives” proportions. People expose their personal lives and inner most secrets to a level that would make people blush in the real world. The other day I was scanning posts and came across the following post on the “Facebook Wall” of one of my friends.

This was a wall post on the profile of a female Facebook friend posting on the public wall of another Facebook friend.

So evidently there is this new pick up line that guys are using it goes like this: ” hey so i would like to see you again” Me? Yeah you! Want my number or do you have Facebook I can find you on there? I laughed! That was the worst pick up line! it is sad that social networking has denigrated into chickenshit dating! How sad! What is ths world is coming to? WTF! “

Doesn’t her statement pretty much sum up Generation Y dating? For much of my dating life we did not even have cell phones. You had to ask for a home number. You took the risk of nosy parents, brothers and sisters answering the phone. You had to be on your game from minute one. How in the world did our parents get by? Isn’t it amazing we are even here? God forbid we should actually have to look someone in the eye when asking them out.

Now we are not even asking for phone number. We are asking for email addresses. We are asking for Facebook and Myspace pages. We are “texting our way to love” We are advertising to the entire social networking world that we are on the market. We have started and ended and relationships on these same sites. We used to break up in restaurants so there would not be a scene. Now we find out for the first time when we see our boyfriend or girlfriend’s Facebook relationship status suddenly set to “single and looking” We try to contact them(on Facebook of course) and find we are now “blocked”. Relationship death by Facebook at its best. I would bet that within the 18-30 crowd there are almost as many relationships started and ended by text, email and social networking announcements than by an actual phone call. God forbid you have the guts to actually meet someone in person and talk about a future or lack thereof.

In my day, if you met a girl in a bar and she thought you were a total geek loser, the phone number she gave you was actually the phone number to Blockbuster Video. (I rented a lot of movies) For Generation X you got a phone number from The Rejection Hotline.(see video below) They have pre-recorded “rejection phone numbers to cover just about any scenario.

Today, your blow-off is a girl giving you an address to her Facebook or MySpace page entitled:

“SALLIE’S MYSPACE PAGE DEDICATED TO THE TOTAL LOSER GEEKS SHE MEETS IN BARS”

When are we going to start seeing “wiki” personals and social networking sites where everyone who knows you basically creates your profile. Would you have the guts to turn your social page into a “wiki” and let the masses collaborate on what your page should say? A social wikipieda not geared at the facts of your life but at who you really are.

We have gone from “Dear John Letters” to “Dear John Phone Numbers” to “Dear John Texts” to” Dear John social networking pages.

I am definitely not naming my kid John. The odds are against him meeting someone right off the bat.

Welcome to dating in the Wiki world.

©2008 Brian Cuban

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5 Comments For This Post

  1. josh evans (1 comments.) Says:

    Social networking is anything but social or networking. I guess if you measure your networking skills based on the number of contacts you have on myspace, then I should probably be asking some of your friends for jobs.

    That aside, the most brilliant piece of information in this blog is the idea of a wiki personal. or something of the sort. i would love to see a group of my friends define who i am through their own words. In the past, they would set you up on a blind date. Now they can create my profile, and submit that to the potential target.

    In your face, Don’t Date Him Girl!

    josh evanss last blog post..The Official Whatever Update – Summer 2008

  2. Madge (1 comments.) Says:

    Oh yes! I agree with you, Josh. I am all for the wiki personal concept. Enough of these narcissistic “About Me” sections. Let the truth be known! Bloggers, Facebookers, MySpacers, show yourselves. Man up and let your friends AND enemies define you.

    Madges last blog post..How to Lie Soap Opera Style. Your Boss Will Love You For It!

  3. Steph (3 comments.) Says:

    Haha! I am all for a wiki personal edited by other people. Oh, that would be priceless. Unfortunately, most people are gutless. A phone call breakup is just as cowardly as a text message, email, or social networking page breakup. Anyone who can’t face their significant other face-to-face needs to go back to kindergarten. They obviously haven’t grown up yet. :-)

    Stephs last blog post..Dead Sea Stone

  4. Sarah (1 comments.) Says:

    Hey Brian,

    Great article! I work for the Rejection Hotline and thought you might enjoy this press release that went out this morning. It relates well to your posting.
    http://ewatch.prnewswire.com/rs/display.jsp?a=50734-499809602-1195476604&key=D|179729|S|0|x|499809602

    Have a good one.
    Sarah

  5. Alex Steed [of Make Something Happen] (1 comments.) Says:

    I could see myself somewhat impulsively agreeing with this sentiment – Things were once more noble than they are now and newer, unknown electronic walls are standing in between our youth where they didn’t stand before. I’d be down with all of that if I wasn’t positive that this same conversation happens any time there was some sort of shift in the way technology works that helps draw a clear line between generations.

    - In my day we couldn’t keep in touch with our lovers the way we can now! We didn’t have telephones. We had to travel X miles to see them? You don’t know how good you have it!

    - These kids with their blogs! In my day, I had to mimeograph, fold, and staple my rants together and then give them to people on the street!

    Things will change. As visual/video technology becomes more readily accessible, we’ll no longer have as big of an excuse to use tech/internet as an excuse to get out of sticky situations. It’s an ever-evolving process and I’m not yet ready to write it off, I think. Also – as gas prices continue to increase, this connected society that has a temporarily unpleasant side-effect in the dating world is going to help to keep us connected when we can no longer drive from point a to point b. I wonder what that will do for dating/love.

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