Tag Archive | "myspace"

Dating In A “Wiki” World

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Dating In A “Wiki” World

Every now and then, when I am bored, I scan wall posts of some of my Facebook friends. It can be a pretty good gauge of what people are doing for fun in your town. It is also a daily soap opera of “Days Of Our Lives” proportions. People expose their personal lives and inner most secrets to a level that would make people blush in the real world. The other day I was scanning posts and came across the following post on the “Facebook Wall” of one of my friends.

This was a wall post on the profile of a female Facebook friend posting on the public wall of another Facebook friend.

So evidently there is this new pick up line that guys are using it goes like this: ” hey so i would like to see you again” Me? Yeah you! Want my number or do you have Facebook I can find you on there? I laughed! That was the worst pick up line! it is sad that social networking has denigrated into chickenshit dating! How sad! What is ths world is coming to? WTF! “

Doesn’t her statement pretty much sum up Generation Y dating? For much of my dating life we did not even have cell phones. You had to ask for a home number. You took the risk of nosy parents, brothers and sisters answering the phone. You had to be on your game from minute one. How in the world did our parents get by? Isn’t it amazing we are even here? God forbid we should actually have to look someone in the eye when asking them out.

Now we are not even asking for phone number. We are asking for email addresses. We are asking for Facebook and Myspace pages. We are “texting our way to love” We are advertising to the entire social networking world that we are on the market. We have started and ended and relationships on these same sites. We used to break up in restaurants so there would not be a scene. Now we find out for the first time when we see our boyfriend or girlfriend’s Facebook relationship status suddenly set to “single and looking” We try to contact them(on Facebook of course) and find we are now “blocked”. Relationship death by Facebook at its best. I would bet that within the 18-30 crowd there are almost as many relationships started and ended by text, email and social networking announcements than by an actual phone call. God forbid you have the guts to actually meet someone in person and talk about a future or lack thereof.

In my day, if you met a girl in a bar and she thought you were a total geek loser, the phone number she gave you was actually the phone number to Blockbuster Video. (I rented a lot of movies) For Generation X you got a phone number from The Rejection Hotline.(see video below) They have pre-recorded “rejection phone numbers to cover just about any scenario.

Today, your blow-off is a girl giving you an address to her Facebook or MySpace page entitled:


When are we going to start seeing “wiki” personals and social networking sites where everyone who knows you basically creates your profile. Would you have the guts to turn your social page into a “wiki” and let the masses collaborate on what your page should say? A social wikipieda not geared at the facts of your life but at who you really are.

We have gone from “Dear John Letters” to “Dear John Phone Numbers” to “Dear John Texts” to” Dear John social networking pages.

I am definitely not naming my kid John. The odds are against him meeting someone right off the bat.

Welcome to dating in the Wiki world.

©2008 Brian Cuban

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Myspace “Outrage Indictment” Perverts Justice

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Myspace “Outrage Indictment” Perverts Justice

Who doesn’t feel sorry for the family of Megan Meir. Their daughter after being harassed mercilessly on Myspace by someone who she thought was a teenage boy by the name of Josh Evan, commits suicide.

We come to find out that the harassment was not by vicious, immature, uncaring Josh, which you could certainly argue happens all the time with teenagers in the real and cyberworld. This harassment however was actually allegedly being perpetrated by vicious, immature uncaring adult Lori Drew who set up a fake Myspace profile, posing as the young Josh Evans. Lori’s daughter was a long time friend of Megans

After months of harassment by this fictional teen peer, Megan, who was already suffering from a myriad of teen social and psychological issues tragically killed herself. You can read a full account of this story in the New Yorker Magazine article.

Lori Drew has now been indicted by a federal grand jury on one count of conspiracy and three counts of accessing protected computers without authorization to get information used to inflict emotional distress on the girl.

Outrageous, immature and cruel behavior by Lori Drew? Absolutely. If this is the kind of behavior she engages in, I would argue she is just as much a danger to the futures of her own children as the mothers in the Texas Polygamist Compound who had their kids placed in foster care. I certainly would not want my kids in the same mall or high school as hers…

In any event, this case engendered enormous publicity and outrage over Drew’s actions and the fact that there did not appear to be any crime committed. Certainly a moral crime but no legal one hence Ms. Drew apparently would continue on her life path not encumbered by the steel bars so many wanted but only her conscience.

In true Jack McCoy, Law and Order style, federal prosecutors decided they they would seek what I call a “outrage indictment” against Lori Drew. An “outrage indictment” is when there is no criminal statute that will hold someone responsible but the public outrage is so great over the act that prosecutors throw every irrelevant statute that has no bearing on the “crime” against the wall to see what sticks. They do this because they know that public outrage is so great that they will get an indictment regardless of how ridiculous the attempt would seen if people were not so outraged over what happened.

The prosecutors even knowing that there is practically no chance of a conviction can then hold their heads high having satisfied the blood lust of those calling for the head of Lori Drew.

I know that Jack McCoy gets convictions all the time on these “outrage indictments” He is my idol.

I certainly understand the publicity and “public deterrent” rationale behind obtaining these “outrage indictments”. Even if you can’t get a conviction there is publicity and deterrent value. Maybe the next idiot parent who would otherwise “act like a child” will think twice and hopefully get some counseling before their next idiot move.

I am not saying there should not be a special place in hell reserved for Lori Drew . Maybe one day there will be appropriate legislation that deals with these types of situations. I have no doubt that there will be numerous emotional “if it was your child” or “you must not have children” type comments. Those are emotional statements. Those are revenge statements. The rule of law is supposed to be unemotional, rational and fairly applied.

Is it a “perversion of justice” that Lori Drew suffers no consequences for her acts? You bet it is. So our solution is to balance out one perversion with another?

A prosecution twisting a statute not intended for this situation to obtain an “outrage indictment” violates every one of those principals and improperly uses the courts to legislate criminal acts Over the next 10 years, you will see proper legislation enacted to address the issue of “cyber bullying” in the social media and other contexts.

Until that time, the rule of law is not about turning Lori Drew into some high tech cyber criminal for which the statute she was indicted under was designed to deal with as much as we would like to see her pay a high price. That is the rule of media justice. That is the rule of outrage justice. That is the rule of a “legal lynch mob”

Not rules to live by….

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12 Year Old Was Stripping At Dallas Club

This story was today’s Dallas Morning News and Speaks For Itself. I was unable to find much about Diamond Cabaret. When you Google Diamond Cabaret, several Dallas Myspace pages do come up. What a shock!

By TANYA EISERER / The Dallas Morning News
The mere fact that a 12-year-old girl danced nude at a northwest Dallas strip club isn’t enough to close its doors.

That’s because the city ordinance that regulates sexually oriented businesses does not allow authorities to revoke the license of such a business for employing someone under the age of 18.

The sixth-grader danced at Diamonds Cabaret over a two-week period late last year, authorities say. They also say they found a 17-year-old girl working in the club in January.

Diamonds Cabaret
“If they’re not shut down, it’s like they’re giving them permission to have underage girls dancing and working in that club,” said the mother of the 12-year-old. The mother is not being named because her daughter, a runaway at the time of the incident, is considered a sexual assault victim.

Operators of the Diamonds Cabaret at 2444 Walnut Ridge Street did not return calls for comment. Their sexually oriented business license expires in November.

Demonica Abron, 27, who worked as a stripper in the club, and David Bell, 22, are facing charges in connection with the 12-year-old girl’s dancing in the club. Mr. Bell does not appear to have been employed by the club.

Police officials are continuing to investigate whether the club’s management knew she was underage.

The 23-page city ordinance does allow revocation of a club’s license if, for example, the club knowingly allows prostitution, the sale or use of drugs at the club, or if there are two convictions for sex-related crimes at the club within a 12-month period.

The department also can suspend, but not revoke, the license of an escort agency for up to 30 days if it has employed anyone under 18.

But the ordinance does not give the department similar power over adult cabarets such as Diamonds Cabaret.

“There’s a laundry list of things we can use to deny or revoke a license, but having a 12-year-old dancing in their establishment is not one of the things that automatically enables us to revoke their license,” said Lt. Christina Smith, a vice unit commander who oversees licensing of such establishments.

The mother of the 12-year-old girl said her daughter ran away in early November. She said the family frantically began looking and her husband finally found their daughter in late November. She was then interviewed by police.

According to court records, the runaway gave the following account:

Mr. Bell and Ms. Abron, who went by the stage name ‘Jewel,’ offered the runaway shelter. Mr. Bell told her that she would be stripping at a club called “Diamonds.”

Mr. Bell dropped them off at the club one day and introduced her to a man named “David” in the club’s office.

“Suspect David asked complainant if she had ever danced before, she said no,” the court records state. “David” then gave her an application, which she filled out with a fake name. She also told him that she was 19.

When “David” asked to see her identification, she told him that she didn’t have one. He told her to bring one when she came to work as a dancer.

“Complainant couldn’t think of a fake birthday, so she told suspect ‘David’ she forgot her birthday,” the records state. “Suspect ‘David’ gave her a funny look and told her she would have been born in 1988 if she was 19.”

A couple of days later, Mr. Bell drove Ms. Abron and the victim back to the club where Ms. Abron introduced her to a man named “Steve.”

“Suspect ‘Steve’ told” the girl “to take her clothes off to see if she was too shy to dance nude,” the records state. He told her she would have to pay a fee ranging from $10 to $30 each time she danced nude.

She danced that night and made about $100, of which she gave $30 to “Steve,” the records state.

The court documents are unclear on how many nights she danced.

The mother of the 12-year-old says she believes the club must have known her daughter was underage.

“I think they just didn’t care,” her mother said. “She’s 12, but she’s got the body of a 20-year-old. All they were thinking about was the money she could bring in.”

She said her daughter is now living with her grandmother in Arlington and again attending school.

Ms. Abron and Mr. Bell were indicted in late February on one count of felony sexual performance of the child in connection with making the 12-year-old work at the club. Both are also accused of engaging in organized crime.

Mr. Bell is accused of two counts of aggravated sexual assault of a child and aggravated kidnapping. He is still being held in the Dallas County Jail in lieu of $450,000 bail.

Ms. Abron, who also faces a prostitution charge, has been released on bail from jail.

Brian Cuban is a an author whose  best-selling book “Shattered Image: My Triumph Over Body Dysmorphic Disorder” chronicles his first-hand experiences living with, and recovering from childhood bullying, eating disorders and Body Dysmorphia Disorder (BDD) and drug addiction.  Brian speaks regularly about his recovery and breaking the male eating disorder stigma.


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Spitzer’s Hooker will be hooked by the IRS…..

Former high priced hooker/escort Ashley Alexandra Dupre’s (aka Kirsten) is ready to cash in big time on her “client #9 fame” liaisons with disgraced and soon to be indicted former New York Governor Eliot Spitzer.   She shouldn’t buy the Park Avenue Penthouse just yet…. 

It is my bet that the tabloids, mainstream press and the blogosphere will make make more out of her projected multi-millionaire status than she will ever see a penny of.  The “Cuban Crystal Ball” is telling me that unless she rolls both her civil and criminal liability into an immunity grant in exchange for her testimony against Spitzer, before the year is out she will be facing both federal and state indictment as well as civil liability for income tax evasion and back taxes.  I admittedly know very little about the area of the law but if I were on the government side I would already be working on a “levy” against any profits she gets from appearances on the talk circut,magazine appearances clothed and unclothed and books. Even if she is able to roll any criminal tax liability into any criminal testimony for the government, I find it very hard to believe she will get a pass on the civil tax liability…..

Any criminal and civil tax attorneys out there to comment?

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